One of the classic stereotypes surrounding a wedding is that the groom is in denial. They go about their daily lives with hardly a clue regarding the hundred things happening around the wedding ceremony. Most men it is said do not have any idea about how their lives will change forever post the wedding ceremony. What’s true for weddings world over holds true to Indian weddings as well. But are Indian grooms in denial an actual behavioural pattern or just a stereotype? We are about to find out!
Before we go about answering the question, let us dissect all the hoopla surrounding the wedding preparations. If you have noticed, most Indian wedding websites dedicate tonnes of posts to the bride, her look, her feelings and her attire, as if the entire wedding is all about the bride. But what about the groom? Does anybody care about the groom? The poor Indian groom only finds a mention in some forgotten corner as a consolation.
With most of the focus on the bride, it is but natural for the Indian groom to find himself left out and away from the center of attention. The often ignored Indian groom is mostly clueless about the various aspects of the wedding, what with the bride taking charge of all the details. He certainly does not have a laundry list of things to do and does not go through the range of emotions that a bride does.
Naturally, his interest level in the events during the run up to the wedding is not very high. Even otherwise, men by nature are not really bothered about the nitty-gritties of fancy things like décor, attire or stage settings. Is the behaviour because he cannot digest the fact that he is to be married soon? Is the Indian groom in denial? Not really!
All that he perhaps is – is bored or disinterested. Tell him you will simplify the ceremonies, make it a fun event where he can sing, dance and make merry with his bunch of friends and you can see his face light up like a bulb! And in the midst of all this, also give due consideration to the fact that the poor man has had a carefree life all these days so it is natural for him to worry now that those days are numbered. All that he needs is some time to wake up to the reality and adjust to the new life. So give him the time before judging him as a groom in denial.
Next time you find the groom-to-be sitting in a corner without displaying over joyous emotions, don’t go and drop the denial stereotype on him. Simply add up the enthusiasm levels of the bride and the groom and you have the perfect concoction that will make for a happy wedding ceremony and a marriage thereafter!
Image credit: Gaurav Chabra, Pinterest